Let's Get Physical

Earlier this week I wrote about how change was inevitable for everyone. I feel like putting that into words was important for me because in my 30s, it has felt like my life has not changed at all. Rewinding back to when I first purchased my home and thinking about who I was and how I was feeling, I realized how untrue this is. I am stronger, mentally, physically and emotionally. There's no doubt my 30s has been about becoming stronger. It's so fun!

Awhile back, I wrote it down and believed it with every feeling in my body

and thoughts. Yoga has changed my life! My physical health and well being is so much better than it was 6 years ago!

The past few years, I have only been getting colds/sinus issues 1 time a year opposed to 5 or 6 times a year! I get a headache once every 3 to 6 months opposed to migraines 1-2 times a month. I am 1-2 inches away from touching my toes when I stretch my hamstrings which is incredible for someone with cerebral palsy. I'm even beginning to incorporate yoga into the work I do with my students which brought out some extra smiles during therapy this week!

It's been a journey so far and with every journey there are road blocks. I would love to say that I am able to do planks 2.5 minutes 4 times a week, but I'm not certain this is really a healthy thing for me to be doing. The past 2.5 years I have been struggling with trunk pain. My neck, back, and peck muscles have been incredibly sore. Only by brainstorming with a massage therapist, physical therapists and my yoga instructor have I been able to figure out why I am in so much pain and I have also been finding solutions to decrease the pain. To summarize, I believe by opening up through yoga my trunk is able to experience what life is like without spasticity and muscle tightness even if it's only for a few minutes. My body naturally tightens up and when it does now, it's more painful than ever. I am feeling better than I have felt in months because I have realized I can't be sedentary too long and it's best to relax and take a break from physical activity when I am feeling overstimulated neurologically. It's been interesting and rewarding to realize what the perfect balance is for my body. Even though I have a physical disability, I think every person struggles to find what this perfect balance is. Will you ever find your perfect balance? Have you tried? How does it make you feel?

As for planks........I will no longer attempt side planks or planks on 3 limbs and I will stop when my wrists are strained. The weight bearing is great for my whole body but I can't risk twisting my trunk. That was this weeks lesson!

CHANGE

Just like the concept of time, I'm not sure if the idea of change is something I cherish or loathe?

Just like the concept of time...with change I essentially have no choice.

Change always happens, whether I get anxious about it avoid it, or prepare for it! 

Sometimes it even sneaks up and surprises me!

When I was younger I always said I hated change.

As I get older I tend to crave it, even though I am very apprehensive to seek it out.

I'm always apprehensive but yet pleasantly surprised at the gifts change brings to me!

That's what it's all about?!

This is the continuation of what I learned from painting the 2 rooms in my house.

First off, I thought without a guy or a strong helper I couldn't accomplish things like this in my home. Yes, I know I could pay someone for all the tough stuff. Is that how any of us want to spend our hard earned money? So, I went through a lot of self talk. My initial thoughts were "Someday when I find a strong helper......this is what I would do different to my house." This summer while painting a bookshelf is when I decided that thought process had to change.  What am I waiting for? If I want something do I need a prince charming. NO! So, as I finished the bookshelf I convinced myself......I can for sure paint walls other than the trim. The rest began to fall into place.

My cousin explained she wanted a break from everything.......her child, husband, job. Even if it was just for a night. I knew I could help her out with this. Anywhere and basically anytime she wanted to go, I'd be her companion. As we were talking over dinner she said, "I will come paint with you, I love to do trim." I asked her if she was certain? She was and it worked out pretty well aside from the fact that my painting project turned out to be 3-4 weeks longer than a weekend! As I was talking to another friend, she also said she enjoyed painting and would help out. I also had to ask for help to move large furniture away from the walls. I asked the neighbor guys which I only try to do once or twice a year. It takes a lot of convincing in my mind to allow friends to help me out. I truly want to know I am capable and don't want to inconvenience anyone.  I just keep telling myself this is apart of friendship and give and take that comes along with any relationship. They will all need me to help out or follow through with the good things I can offer to the friendship.

So, I learned that even though I'm "alone", I'm not alone. This was a pretty cool feeling to have. I totally worked slower as I was talking to my buddies/helpers. My cousin and I had hours to catch up on talking about every subject possible. We rarely stopped talking and covered all basis which felt good for both of us. My friend and I also had time to chat and many times we were interrupted by her cute/lively son who enjoyed sucking up cat hair with a large lint brush roller from my floor and furniture for hours. Having buddies come over and help make home improvements actually made my house feel like a home!

Since painting was a learning curve for me, it took me much longer than I thought it would. I also added on 2 pieces of furniture into the mix. I really enjoyed having a project on the weekends and after work to go to. Other than my job, I was doing something with purpose and I really liked this. I was on Facebook and Netflix a lot less and that's important to me.

I began to realize, this is my 30s. You see, without a big wedding to plan, adjusting to marriage, pregnancies or little scrubbers wandering around.....it's felt like, what's up with my 30s?  I don't regret not having what I don't have but for the vast majority of people these are the things occupying their time in their 30s. Without regrets, I've still gone through phases where I wonder what my purpose in life is? Should I run a business? Become a writer? What are my next set of goals?

Lately, I have noticed these feelings starting to slip away. My life is full and busy with so many little things. I probably won't run a successful business and I will probably only write for my own pleasure (stress relief). But all of that is beginning to matter less and less because I have been living my life as it comes each day. I've been learning lessons. It's okay to ask for help, even if it isn't a true emergency. Household projects take time and actually create memories. I also shouldn't really be waiting for the big strong guy, life is too short.

Being in my 30s without a partner or kids to raise? I never really predicted being here. But I am! I do think it's important to have goals and I have some that I would like to accomplish within the next year or 2 but sometimes life is what happens when I am knee deep in paint! I wouldn't really change it for anything!

We're a cool Duo

Hello cerebral palsy! We’ve been together since the beginning which too many seems like a tragedy. The physical delays or actual losses, getting picked on, misunderstood because my speech is affected, being a minority, learning difficulties, aches and pains. You are the easiest thing to blame every challenge or misfortune I have on. But that’s not fair because everyone struggles and has things they want to change about themselves. 

I will say, you have taught me to never give up regardless of how big the obstacle is. You are there to remind me to always be compassionate and empathetic (not sympathetic towards others). You allow me to appear soft and vulnerable on the outside but hard & unbreakable on the inside. You have taught me patience, resilience and resourcefulness. By making a decision to have a good relationship with you and live full each day...I somehow inspire others just by minding my own business and putting up with you 💗so I suppose we’re a pretty cool duo...”you and me!”

Gratitude Challenge

I am doing a 21 day gratitude challenge which will hopefully increase my blogging! Today I am using the alphabet to encourage the thoughts of what I am grateful for:

A: Artichokes - I don't know why I like them
B: Babies - I love having fun with and getting to know other people's babies
C: Chromebook at work - its much lighter weight than my laptop
D: Dad - he is the best
E: Epsom salts - have helped my aches and pains
F: Friends - life long friends, acquaintances and everyone in between
G: Grand Haven
H: Home - It is in fact becoming a Siesta Hut, so relaxing!
I: Iris - the flower that reminds me of my dad
J: Job - to enjoy my home, friends and travel
K: Kindness from others
L: Lake Michigan
M: Massages
N: Netflix
O: Organization - it does make my life easier
P: Piper - my quiet reserved cat also known as my shadow
Q: Quality time spent with people I love the most
R: Remembering good times from the past
S: Summer vacation
T: Travel
U: Ultra soft clothes to dress in
V: Vivid colors to decorate my house and to dress in
W: Writing - a way to make sense of life
X: X-ray's - so I can stay healthy
Y: Yoga - has made me physically healthier
Z: Zoey - my cat that has so much zest for life

Home Make over...Pintrest is mean.

I don't take new experiences for granted, so I have to share my experiences on painting just 1-2 rooms. Even though I had stained a deck and painted furniture, I was in fact a rookie.

Pintrest is mean because it misleads anyone into thinking DYI projects are really easy and you end up spending more money than originally intended!

I remember writing a blog post in the summer of 2016 about how I would NEVER be staining a deck by myself again. Somehow, my naive ways struck me. Painting a master bedroom and bathroom will be way easier than staining a deck. I love home ownership and have no regrets but it is work or incredibly expensive. Or both. I won't lie to anyone thinking about it.

I learned the physical components of painting (which I will share in this post). I also had some realizations which sparked some personal growth which will probably be better in a separate post.

How hard is it to pick paint colors? Actually, with how things will look visually I am pretty decisive so this wasn't too bad. Blues and maybe in the bathroom green(ish)/blue. Colors that were beachy but not brown. I did however worry about my bedroom being too blue. My curtain, bedspread, pictures and a couple of shelves were blue already. I did not like bright greens or even calmer greens for my bathroom from the start, so I went with a blue that had more aqua/teal in it from the choices I had for my bedroom. In the bedroom, I really liked a bright blue......but I knew that was going to be way too much for all the walls. My indecision began. I had no idea what I truly wanted for my entire bedroom. This was why I picked one neutral color for my entire house 6 years ago.

My cousin was going to help me paint. She had recently done an ombre painting technique in her daughter's bedroom and it turned out pretty cool. This would allow me to use my awesome bright blue with the majority of the room being a lighter blue. With the help of Pintrest I got pretty carried away about this and my over zealous ideas were a fail! After painting 2 walls with the ombre technique, I was then able to decide I wanted 1 accent wall with the bright blue and then the rest of the room would be a lighter blue. Decision was made even though I had to paint over some sections of the 2 walls.

I realized from the start trimming would be hard for me. My cousin and a good friend were able to help. However, my impatience and independent nature caused a few mishaps as I was painting each wall the actual color I wanted it. So, I learned about paint rollers and naps. Specifically, dried out naps. Dried out naps do not spread fresh paint when you are trying to cover coats of paint on your walls. Dried out naps also are difficult to slide off the roller when you leave them overnight. I carelessly did not pay attention to this because I had paint brushes😏Hours and hours of painting with a paint brush on 2 large bedroom walls, I look at both walls in the light. I am thinking that these strokes on the wall look really bad! So, I received my paint roller and nap lesson and in the end a large paint roller that is clean does the job so much better.  It was only 6 hours lost and a few minutes of feeling naive and kind of dumb.

I also realized that trimming a room like this takes someone who has painted before 7 hours!! I couldn't believe it. Suddenly slapping on stain on an outside deck seemed easier.

Do not believe for a second I didn't try some trimming. In my bathroom there are spots in between my mirror, doorway and vanity that are about 2 inches. My cousin had said, we'll just go back to Lowes and but the smallest brush we can find. Impatience and independence snuck right in and I did this myself. It doesn't look too bad but it took about 4-6 hours to do this and touch up my white trim around doors/baseboards. I also need to mention 5 of these 6 hours were on my knees, which felt very, very painful!

As I was touching up baseboards and trimming on week 3 of my bedroom being torn apart, I grew disappointed in my bedroom furniture even though I loved my walls. How could this be? Why has the Feng Shui bug hit me. Back on Pintrest I went 😏Painting wooden antique furniture. It's possible. My room is in disarray now so the quest must continue. Could my wrists handle sanding? Would the primer smell cause brain damage to my cats and to me? I am going to do this on carpet and near my bedding?

The worst situation was using an old tarp my dad had given me from his garage. He had used it for other painting projects and it's probably 50 years old. My neighbors came over and put the pieces of furniture on this tarp. It was dirty and smelled like mildew 😓. I kept thinking it would air out. I need a tarp under this furniture. It lasted 1 1/2 days and one Tuesday morning I woke up and lifted the furniture corner by corner to move the tarp out of my room. It took 30 minutes and I threw it in the garage while still in my PJs. I used an old shower curtain liner I had from my house.

I learned about liquid sander and the primer smell wasn't too bad. Half way through week 4 I brought a chair into the working area to sit on while I was painting. My hips and knees have been so angry at me. I estimated 18 hours if I was going to do the 3 pieces of furniture. I only did 2 pieces of furniture and it probably took me 9 hours.

It's done and I really love my bedroom and bathroom! I do appreciate all of the Pintrest ideas and helping me believe my home can actually be beautiful. I have also looked up how to make words out of those LED light I bought, back splashes for kitchens and teracotta accent walls for my kitchen/living room 😂 which is about 2-3 household projects away.

Stay tuned for more lessons this project taught me. 

Little Reminders

I have taken a break from writing and in many ways my Siesta Hut rampage. Someone summer said "Well it's all there for when you need it." Thank goodness! 

I believe in taking take of myself and having reassurance that my nursing home stories are good ones! Never ever do I want to say "I hated my job for 30 years and Netflix was my saving grace." But I'm alright with saying I blogged my perspective on how to cope with the ups and downs in life for years and it touched many people.

I could write a long list of bureaucratic annoyances this week. My job, is in fact "a job." A sprained wrist from tripping and falling 3 weeks ago is a "sprained wrist." Bills are "bills."  However, I am not making any rash decisions to change my circumstances otherwise, therefore I have absolutely no reason to complain.

Yes, my job falls under the category of a sprained wrist and bills. It could much so much worse (a broken wrist) and it is the backbone to my stability (who doesn't pay bills and have responsibilities).

A few very important thoughts popped into my mind tonight:
1.) It's not the circumstances or challenges we are given it's how we handle ourselves in these situations. I can be negative or positive with what lands in my life.
2.) If I am being negative over and over.....why am I not doing anything to change the situation I am in?
3.) Truthfully with my job, if I put in my best effort for 7-10 hours 5 days a week, there is nothing wrong that will still matter in 1 month, 6 months or a year. This should be considered a blessing. I witness myself and others "sweating the small stuff too much!"
3.) The past couple of years I have brainstormed the things that would make me the happiest...taking action and following through is the hardest part. I like being organized to the point where rushing is rare. And it's okay to take a personal day quarterly just because - there's research to prove this.
4.) Young, eager, motivated college students are amazing! They pump some of that energy into me!
4.) My career is helping others to "live life to it's fullest!"  This may not only be in writing IEP goals or even becoming a business owner......it's how I present myself each and everyday towards life's bureaucracies, challenges and mishaps.

Basically, I'm your gal to turn that frown upside down. Just chill and ask yourself's....what are your stories in the nursing homes going to be about?!