Soft on the Outside! Hard on the Inside!

The Kim"isms" are back!

What do people say when you ask them who they are? Many times you will hear "I am somebody's mom or wife." Or "I am a nurse, or accountant."  Maybe you hear, "I like playing golf or every weekend in the summer I spend time on my boat." Those are great descriptions and pieces of individuals identities. But every mom, every accountant and every boat owner handles life's surprises and their journey's very differently! To me, realizing and accepting this is a great step to earning personal self confidence.

I kind of like Shrek's description, "I'm an onion, there are several different layers to me." I like this because it's truthful and not avoiding the emotional characteristics of who he is. I also think it's truthful for all of us. We all have different layers and all of our layers end up differently than the people around us.

Since we are on to the topic of food, awhile back it dawned on me that I am the opposite of a bagel! I'm soft on the outside and hard on the inside! On the outside I struggle physically and sometimes I need help. I am sensitive, so I cry easily and wear my heart on my sleeve. I come across like I trust easily and tend to be very agreeable with others. I am very lovable and others tend to open up easily to me. On the flip side I have realized that there isn't much I can't overcome as an individual. It takes a lot for me to give up on being successful or achieving a goal I set for myself. I am independent almost to a fault. I do have people in my life who are helpful, kind, fun and friendly. However, I depend on very few! Even though people view me as soft and easy to warm up to I feel like I will listen to my instincts be aware of my threshold for when I am being taken an advantage of or heading down the wrong path with someone.

Rather than saying what you do or what you enjoy, think about how you would describe yourself. What type of food are you?

The Path Narrows...but the Plot Thickens!

First off I have got to say - thank you for reading and following my journey!

Last weekend was a 3 day weekend. A few days before that I was really thinking hard about where my career path was headed. After the long weekend I feel my path is really beginning to narrow! I looked up how to improve  my blog and got some really good ideas that I want to start using. I dipped my toe into looking at new immediate sources of income. I updated my LinkedIn account. Nothing really felt right, I just felt more stressed. At about 10pm Saturday night last weekend an idea popped into my head that sparked my passion. I have realized that I just have to trust my intuition and keep making the dreams and ideas an actual reality.  As I was researching how to improve my blog, I asked myself "Why don't I just create The Siesta Hut as an online blog or business?" I can make interactive quizzes or survey's (which is a tip for blogging - make it interactive). By Tuesday night after advice from another professional, I was suddenly getting advice on how to create a website with a role of being a life coach. I began creating my website Wednesday night and have made little changes to it this weekend (it's not yet published). But instead of feeling stressed out by working, I find this all very exciting and slightly nerve wrecking. As I gained ideas for the website and polishing up my ideas, I found myself thinking about the 2 professions I have a college degree in. I feel passionate about this - like it's my creation!

I've learned to make a successful personal business I need a motto and a mission statement which is about as far as I've gotten so far. Once I thought of a motto, it just didn't slip my mind. The motto of The Siesta Hut is "Holistic Approach. Productive Results."

I still plan on maintaining a balance. Friends and family time are important to me. So is sleep.  I actually broke down and hired a helper for cleaning and other things around the house. I did not miss cleaning the bathroom one millisecond this weekend!  But I am hoping that some of my Kim time will be spent fulfilling my passion. If this is the path I am headed down I must practice what I preach!

                                               

Stop That Stinkin Thinkin!!

Or at least know that Gratuity goes a long way! Having negative thoughts over and over changes the outcome and course of ours lives. Thoughts are powerful and provide more control than what we all think.

From https://www.psychologytoday.com/basics/gratitude it is described that gratitude can increase well being, happiness, energy, optimism and empathy. On the website http://jamesclear.com/positive-thinking it is stated negative emotions program your brain to do a specific action and therefore the rest of the world around you does not seem to matter. This means negative emotions narrow your mind and focus your thoughts. Negative emotions closes your brain off from the outside world and focuses on the negative emotions of fear, anger and stress. On the flip side positive thoughts have the opposite effect. When you have positive emotions your sense of possibility broadens and your mind opens up to more options. Positive emotions also enhance ability to build skills and build skills for later in life.

The past few November's I have noticed people posting about what they are most grateful for each day for the entire month. I think this is a good way to practice and build positive thoughts. It's also nice when people are able to put a gratuity journal next to their beds. I tried this sometime about a year and a half ago for a few weeks. I still feel like I have subsiding effects from that exercise. My narrow mindedness, lonely days or yucky days have lessened the past year. It's not easy and it does take practice, focus and effort. But internally I feel like I have noticed a difference.

I realize that some of my recent posts have been somewhat "alarming." She has an amazing job where she helps kids with disabilities, that allows her to support herself and she gets summers off, what's her problem?

The point of this post is to say I KNOW all of the above are true!

On the flip side you can never know what people are going through until you've been in their shoes.

Other facts running through my mind regarding positive thoughts and gratuity include the fact that there is a large number of people with disabilities who are unable to be employed for various reasons. I am on the other side of that statistic which is a thought that runs through my mind often. I'm eternally grateful for this. The majority of my work week I work with several compassionate, dedicated, friendly, loving people. Some of them may end up being present in my life for a very long time to come. I never get caught in traffic on my way to work.

I have also begun to realize it's okay to be grateful for having the mind, passion and drive to allow myself to keep wanting more when it comes to exploring what paths my education and current work and life experiences could take me down. This is how I will expand my horizons and become a unique individual. I am grateful for the stability I do have so I am able to explore my passions and things that are interesting to me. I'm grateful I chose a profession that has a variety of areas that I like to learn about. I'm grateful I have the attitude to think about things in this perspective rather than complain or react due to fear or anxiety.

The Siesta Hut - It's Here to Stay!

Well! I don't actually have a physical building or place where the Siesta Hut is located however the ideas and philosophy behind this idea are just not leaving my mind. Which is exciting and a little strange because I have absolutely no idea how to make this type of dream a reality. I guess it will be a series of trial and error, along with brainstorming and taking several different paths.

One thing that keeps entering my mind is the fact that someday I would like to earn money while I am taking care of myself and the extra physical needs I do have. Hopefully, along the way I can help and inspire other people along the way. So, I am not going to back down on expanding my knowledge/researching and discussing a few things:
                               1. Yoga
                               2. Relaxation Techniques
                               3. Time Management
                               4. Essential Oils from Young Living
                               5. Being financially aware and prepared to take tons of SIESTA's - someday!

We are all going to be apart of the working world for about 40-50 years throughout our life time. Sorry to depress you, but it's a reality not to ignore. I think it is important to make sure it is something we love to do! Have it be something that is close to our hearts and thoughts or something that we are passionate about. As I have gotten older I have realized a passion or drive can change and that is okay! Actually changes and twists/turns should be embraced and celebrated!

Finding a Balance

I guess this is a follow up to last weeks post. I felt like I was missing some important concepts or thoughts regarding "everything in moderation." It may sound like a repeat of last weeks post but I feel like my thoughts are in better order this week.

1. I feel like it is healthiest to maintain a certain level of homeostasis when approaching life. Homeostasis is a "state of psychological equilibrium obtained when tension or drive has been reduced or eliminated" or the ability to "maintain internal stability" (dictionary.reference.com). Therefore finding a balance or realizing every component of life should be attempted with the goal of moderation is good. It will lower stress levels, anxiety and blood pressure.

2.) Life has it's ups and downs. It's not a flat line which is the visual that comes to mind when we think of something like homeostasis or our balance. But if it is a flat line, then that means we are dead! I feel like downward slopes should be discussed and even celebrated just like the ups. However it concerns me that society shapes us all to believe that we should be climbing a linear uphill celebration. I tend to see it has more of a false battle. Anything less than a linear uphill battle isn't really celebrated, in fact we tend to punish ourselves which causes behaviors we all aren't proud of at times.

3.) Addiction. If it is all or nothing with something major or minor maybe it is best to ask yourself, why? Why am I pushing so hard? Why am I avoiding this or that? What causes a negative or bad behavior? How are you feeling when it is all or nothing? Unhealthy? Guilty? If it's a healthy behavior your kind of obsessing over (working to hard, exercising and eating right)...why are you so obsessed? Please be sure there's no resentment or anger involved in striving to be the "best."

Finding my balance isn't an easy task but it's something I want to always be mindful of and continue striving for.

Everything In Moderation!

Kim"isms" Part 2

There are a lot of things in this world that can be taken to extreme. Actually - everything! Addiction is something that we all tend to struggle with, whether it it is something very serious such as drugs, alcohol or unhealthy behaviors. Or it could be minor addictions that gradually eat away at our inner peace and overall happiness such as working to hard, video games, social media or consuming to much sugar. Sometimes trying our hardest to succeed at something can become an addiction or obsession just because we loose other components of who we are just to reach that goal or sustain a certain type of lifestyle. I feel like this type of motivation and drive is okay to a certain extent because this is how ordinary people achieve wonderful things. However, at some point in time something has got to give. None of us are perfect. None of us are always going to be prepared to maintain mom of the year, wife of the year or employee of the year status. None of us are always going to be in first place during our 5Ks. I think overall as a society we need to learn that this is okay. The smartest, sexiest, friendliest people are also at times going to be the dumbest, laziest, rude/grouchy people you could ever come across.

The way I see it, rather than striving to be the best at everything or even the best at 1 or 2 things we all need to focus on finding our middle ground. This sounds so easy and simplified however the more I think about it and begin to focus on it, the more complicated this concept becomes.

Taking Time to Savor...Everything!

Kim"isms" Part 1 - Yes, a series of my life perspective!

I'm slow with everything I do which is good because I can savor every aspect of life.  It's kind of like foodies forcing themselves to eat slow to enjoy all the textures and flavors of the food they view as art. I do eat slowly however it is not forced, I'm just a natural!

To me it is more than just food or art. Everything in life should be savored and cherished. Nothing ever stays the same and we all only have one chance to experience everything life has to offer. From bad dates, hard tests, to watching friends move away, to traveling across the world, and owning a home and car with my own money. It all has meaning and makes me who I currently am today!

Each phase of my life I have taken several months or years to process what I am experiencing and thinking/feeling about those experiences. Very few times I have felt overwhelmed or to stressed to truly slow down to think and acknowledge what I am feeling. This is a good quality because I feel like I am able to be very decisive about the choices I make. This also means I am a more honest person because of my decisive, cautious nature. Many people learn to rush around and jump to the next stages of their lives without acknowledgement of the reasons why they are doing something or what they learned or feel from the situation. But yet to me it looks like they have everything they could ever ask for so easily and quickly.

I guess I am summarizing these thoughts because I have noticed that very amazing gifts have come into my life however it seems that it takes much longer for these gifts to come along. When the gifts do come along they come in small doses and one at a time. I am naturally able to be incredibly grateful and make a small gift into an enormous life blessing. It's my way of realizing I truly have it all. I couldn't ask for more and I am really looking forward to the next several phases I get to slowly savor!