A couple of weeks ago as I looked at some of the things I had written as a teenager, I was reminded of how much I have always enjoyed the little things in life.
These things range from watching the movie Annie, the puppet show Fragle Rock and cartoon Smurfs on lazy Sunday's while I was able to stay in my Pajamas all day as a kid. My parents also always encouraged me to participate, enjoy and try my best in activities where I could become apart of a group of the community. I was apart of various activities such as horseback riding in a 4-H club and bowling on a league. I was a typical tween in the late 80s/early 90s and listened to cassette tapes on my Fisher Price tape recorder with the neighbor girl on my front porch. Learning to ride my bike without training wheels and raking leaves in my Grandma's front yard were also special memories I have.
Even though I had a few select friends in elementary school I wasn't a kid who savored each moment of my elementary school years. Playing on the playground, participating in field day or any other type of elementary activity never thrilled me much. I'm not sure if "cynical" is the correct word to describe myself at age 9 or 10.....just accepting that I wasn't going to be in the "cool" crowd. I was different than everyone else and that's just how it was going to be. So I began to appreciate really simple things in life. I was never going to be a ballerina, cheerleader or good at jump rope. My hairstyle and clothes were also a little bit different than everyone else's too and I was a giant at this age. The beginning of 6th grade I wore size 10 shoes and in 7th grade I plateaued in my growth and wore the same size of clothes until I was 32 years old.
The fact I had CP was just one of my minor differences. I think at a very young age I was able to blame my awkwardness (being more mature and sensitive than most kids) on my most obvious flaw, my physical disability. Looking back, I probably shouldn't have given the CP so much credit or attention. Little did I know, every single pre-teen feels awkward and acts weird regardless of their clothes or athleticism.
When I entered into middle school I felt as if I got a clean slate. I have never liked change so this wasn't an easy move for me. I hated the first couple of weeks of 6th grade and expressed that to my parents and teachers. It was suggested by my team of teachers that good students, cheerleaders, pretty girls be predisposed to be my friends. The 3rd or 4th week of school these 2 girls started being extra nice to me. They talked to me and invited me to lunch. I had one of them over to my house and I remember we played scrabble. It was nice and kind and according to research or maybe a textbook, this was a great idea. But on the inside I was thinking "What the hell is going on?" I had nothing in common with these girls! As I look back at having been assigned friends, I am bummed that I had to go through this experience but I also don't know what the answer is to help kids at this age succeed socially.
Luck and basically blessings continued to remain on my side. Midway through 6th grade and into 7th grade I met friends that dressed and acted similar to me. These were girls that laughed at goofy things and worked hard on their school work. We had similar interests and family backgrounds and each of us aimed to please others. So, I clutched on to the friendships I had created and had countless slumber parties, bike rides and passed notes back and forth with them throughout middle school/jr. high. The fact that I was absolutely terrible in gym, took notes much slower and ended up on the B honor roll rather than the A honor roll never was really discussed. I had the opportunity to focus on and enjoy the simple things in life at that age rather than my most obvious flaw.
It's cool that from the very beginning I was learning to focus on the things that really mattered in life.
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